IT’S NOT GOOD TO SHOW OFF
It was in a South Norfolk village, the autumn evening was tranquil and warm so groups of locals were taking advantage of it, strolling and chatting on the green.
Outside the Red Lion were a group of ‘ shooters’, the ‘guns’ as they are called in these parts, mainly youngish lads who sounded well pleased with their day spent destroying the local wildlife. They seemed determined to inform everyone else of their prowess, and were letting them know what fun they were having by emitting loud guffaws, all seemed to talk and no one to listen. A small gathering of young ladies were chatting nearby, a group of friends out to enjoy the evening. Their behaviour was lively but restrained, an occasional chuckle could be heard but the conversation in general passed freely as only it can amongst friends.
A young man walked sedately towards the two groups. A dapper man , done up a treat, tidy and neat. A lovely sweeping quiff swept across his forehead from under his stylish hat, a delight to see. He turned towards the ladies with a broad smile he then doffed the hat with a sweeping gesture but alas, the beautiful quiff remained with the hat before flopping to the ground at the young ladies feet.
“What the hell is THAT!!” The young lady screamed, abandoning her usual polite decorum, with the emphasis on THAT. Her high pitched cry pierced through the still evening air reaching the ears of the young shooters. Amidst the noise and hubbub of the pub they heard the cry “What the hell, a RAT!!”.
What young man with drink upon him could resist a chance to show off his prowess. He promptly cocked his gun and shot the beast as it lay there on the grass. Sadly at that very moment the dapper young man who was now a bald blushing embarrassed young man had swooped down to retrieve the escaped quiff. So he tragically exchanged his wig for a hole in the head.
So much for vanity.
John Loker 2021